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Not quite sure what happened but I feel burdened. The rain started halfway through lunch. I could feel raindrops on my exposed skin, it could have gone into my soup. Ah, but nothing is comparable to the dampening cold spirit that sinks with every rain drop that lands on your skin and dried by the breeze. Horrible coming of the december rain, why can't we be cool but not wet? I like cool humid air but not cold damp shoes.

His wedding

Don't ask me how I know, but he is already engaged and that status is going to change this February. Anytime now, his family (literally) is going to intrude into my neighbourhood.


Enjoying the infinity pool just outside their living room, in a huge bedroom with a walk-in wardrobe and spacious bathroom. Top of the house, minimal interference. Cute dog, car. Beauty treatments, sleepovers. Family dinners, welcoming members. Dance.


I am happy for him and for her. But that doesn't reduce or explain the sadness within me. I can't help but admit I am still affected in a strange way. She could have been me. The me that I had left behind, knowing full well there's never going to be a man I'll meet who can give so much love..simply because... she is the world to him.